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Monday, June 09, 2014

The Age Of Engagement

The Ring Finger is the new middle finger to single twentysomethings.

 I guess we are at an age where marriage isn't so far off. Where people are getting pregnant on purpose. One-by-one my friends boyfriends get down on one knee, while I'm still down on two knees trying to get a second date.

I don't know what I would do if someone proposed to me. Or even if I was asked to live with someone other than my dog (who eats the crumbs from my floor).

It took me a while to even try a ring on 'that finger', but as I search for the feeling your parents promised you would experience, also known as love, I wonder if my 'ring finger' will always be barren.

Butterflies were so easy when you were younger. Your gut told you who you liked, but now it's your head. You begin to form a 'must have' checklist that grows after every date-gone-wrong: 

  • university education
  • dual citizenship
  • tall
  • not on social media
  • not religious
  • loves his family (from a distance)
  • has friends
  • likes staying home sometimes
  • likes travelling
  • enjoys drinking

Maybe the people getting married in their 20's locked down a significant other before their list grew too long. Before their head took over their heart. Therefore, they can plunge into a promise of 'forever and always'. 

Just as the old saying goes; the rich get richer and the poor get poorer, the same can be said for The Age of Engagement; The couples get closer, whilst the singles get pickier. 

So what can stop us singles from spiralling into the depths of despair, riding a motorized scooter around WalMart buying 10lbs of discount chocolate every February 15th? 

Have a single friend (or friends).
- if you're going down, bring someone with you.

Have a cynical coupled friend.
- she/he loves being in a relationship but enjoys dabbling in the fun. They are living proof you can have it all. 

Have a heart-to-heart with your head.
- does your checklist give you butterflies, or paper work? If you feel a spark with a guy on the street or at a bar, follow your heart, prepare with your head, and make your move. Sparks aren't easy to come by.

Have fun.
- If dating is causing you to have a nervous breakdown, step back. Delete your Tinder app, go out with your friends, and enjoy your life. 

- Elizabeth George

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